oatmeal_queen: ((breathe.))
if i could have one day to see you; to hear your voice and watch you smile, i would wish it was fifteen days from now. i wouldn't have been getting married six years ago obviously, but i wish you could have been there anyway.
i don't get to walk down the aisle with you, and the thought hurts so much that my chest aches, but your sons are picking up the slack, so don't worry :3

another year gone, still the single most horrible day of my life to date, and still i miss you with all of my heart <3

it's time to make March a better anniversary.

wedding 101

Aug. 8th, 2010 08:46 pm
oatmeal_queen: (tin man - cain)
stolen from [livejournal.com profile] authoressnebula, cause i could.

mememememeeee )

Been horribly busy. between working, drawing, trying to be semi-social and then organizing as much as i can for a wedding...i have no life.
which, btw, i don't care what anyone says, planning a wedding is a veritable nightmare if you haven't been dreaming of it since birth. srsly. i had no plans, nothing in mind, no image of what it was all supposed to look like when that life altering day would come and everything would just fall into place. pffft. bullshit. its hard.
i am going to be ECSTATIC when i can just BE married and all of this can be done. did you know the average wedding costs 27k? THAT'S AVERAGE. WHERE ARE PEOPLE GETTING THIS MONEY.

on the plus side, the design aspect of it is rather fun, but well, saw that coming since i have an affinity for design. that and so far there have been plenty of people around to keep me sane. so far so good. the wedding itself will be on March 25 of next year, so who knows what'll happen between now and then. at this point, if i don't kill my mother (or myself) before this is all over, i'll consider it win/win. possibly.
oatmeal_queen: (cone of shame)

So, a good long while back, i promised a recap of my trip to England/Asylum. yeah...so didn't get to that. my apologies if anyone was waiting for it (which, i certainly hope not because i can be really friggen boring) i am actually going to do a separate entry for that since i do have some awesome pics to share, but i'm not really gonna go into detail. sorry bout that guys, i fail, i know. i've just been hampered down with a lot of stuff recently and haven't had the time for blogging *gasp*

but hey, free moment. like, now.

so onto inconsequential stuff.

So i saw Toy Story 3 and loved it...SPOILERS )

i've heard horrid things about Airbender, so i'm not even bothering to give the theater money for it. i'll take my chances with assistance from netflix tyvm. its how i saw g.i. joe *shudders* so i'm sticking with that. i heard twilight was better than airbender, which is the saddest thing i have ever heard.

its too damn hot for words this week. i hate running the AC all the time, but i'm on the top floor. in a hundred degree weather at the top of an apartment complex that cooks and does laundry ALL THE TIME? if not for AC, i'd be dead.

is it friday yet? i'm ready for a road trip.
oatmeal_queen: (CHRISTMAS WOO)
so hey, how bout a real entry this time.

post surgery stuffs, some slightly TMI )

in other news, no Supernatural til January :( still working on the fifty things i gotta finish drawing, coloring and otherwise FINISHING for people (but am happy to be inspired regardless)
gotta apartment hunt very friggen soon, so i'm moving NEXT MONTH. WHUT.
i cannot believe it's December.


Oct. 19th, 2009 09:52 pm
oatmeal_queen: (fosters home for FIST SHAKING)
For the people on my F-list that know my phone #, just so's ya know, my phone is currently deactivated. it is pushing up daisies. it ceases to be. it was an accident by my brother while they were getting me my new phone, and unfortunately it won't work again until i take it to an at&t place and MAKE THEM FIX IT. damnitall.

Email would be the easiest way to reach me until then, please don't bother poor [livejournal.com profile] happytemplar, she's not my secretary. yet. At least until i get all of this crap sorted, stick with the email.
gawd i hate phones. XP
oatmeal_queen: (may i never be...)
the obligatory 'night before' post, i guess.
wow, that kinda rushed up on me. yikes.

So tomorrow i go into the hospital for an open RNY surgical procedure (aka, gastric bypass). i'll be there for three days, two nights, so long as everything comes out ok and i'm doing ok. then i come home and will be off work having the crappiest three week vacation in the history of ever.
its gonna hurt, i have no allusions to think otherwise. but hey, getting shot would be worse. (i assume)

my mother is coming to stay with me til sunday, which has its pluses and minuses really x_x i love that i'll have someone to help me that i trust (and don't feel so bad asking for help) but on the other hand...it's my mother. she can't help but send my anxiety through the roof, it never fails, and she's going to bend over backwards to make sure everything is done according to her methods of healing. which is gonna drive me batshit by friday, i'm betting. drugs or not.

but anyway, i'm ok. :3 am keeping positive, and not really planning things to a tee cause really, it's easier if i don't. nothing's going to go right to plan, and that's ok. i'll work with whatever. i've been very VERY lucky that i have some of the best friends a human could ever ask for <3 srsly, there's no way in hell i would have gotten through this month without an ulcer or a hemorrhage or something if not for my buddies, and i love you guys so fucking much because of that. *gush*
[livejournal.com profile] happytemplar deserves a fucking medal for dealing with my crappy moods. srsly.
if i don't make it, you guys get first dibs to pillage my shit. tho cremate me with my markers, damnit.

i'm pretty sure i'll make it through ok. i've got a good Doc, all the tests say i'm 100% healthy (which i totally didn't believe, lol, but someone with a doctorate says so, it must be true). i'm young and i do pretty good with teh healing from past experience (considering how accident prone i am). i really do think i'm gonna be ok :3

but don't get me wrong, there will be plenty of bitching to come.

tl;dr, this month sucked, surgery is soon, and i'll come back online next week and let everyone know i'm still alive X) promise.

and i have cleverly ended this otherwise bland and depressing post with random art, just to fool you! (warning, kinda big and cartoony)

anywho, i'm gonna spend the rest of the evening distracting myself, pretending to be productive and preparing for when my mother arrives x_x SO MUCH FUN, I TELL YOU.

Everyone stay classy til i get back. <3
i mean it, i expect the awesome to wait til i return. e.e
oatmeal_queen: (copic eat babies)
Spent the 4th of July with [livejournal.com profile] psychosako and our Bellydancing troupe. we were surrounded by people setting off fireworks for like, miles around. yummy food, awesome people. no crowded, crazy DC metro.

i signed up to do the Dean/Cas anonymous fic exchange, and of COURSE they gave me someone who was really awesome to write for that i am INCREDIBLY INTIMIDATED BY. gawdamnitall.
gonna do it anyway. as soon as i grow some balls.

Stein played with my desktop for a bit (cleaned it mostly) and i can at least play L4D again with only the slightest bit of hiccups. as opposed to how bad it was before.
i keel zombays! and asplode ma teemates!

i haven't been able to draw all weekend -.- as much as i wanted to. even writing has been sparse. i think i sapped out my muse. *slaps her cheek*

My little brother's fiancé (my soon to be sister in law) called me tonight to confirm the details for their engagement party two weeks from now. coo, family weekend it is.
then she asked me to be a bridesmaid ;___;
*sniffs* uh...YES.

chipped a DAMN TOOTH. on potato chips DX
aaaarrrrrggggghhhhh so.not.cool.


I know I'm a year late, but... )


Mar. 28th, 2009 06:20 pm
oatmeal_queen: (patrick stewart squee)
My baby brother is engaged.

dawwwwww <3
tis the season, i guess X)
oatmeal_queen: (spn - cas lookin tired)
I went soul searching yesterday but all I found was a missing pair of socks. Which is ok, I guess, but it would have been more helpful to find the tv remote instead. i swear it got sucked into a black hole somewhere between my bed and my desk (about three feet).

Nothing too interesting going on, but my brother scolded me for not updating so that he knows for sure that i'm not deadand can't have my stuff. he's so sweet, lol X)
speaking of the sasquatch tho, he now has in possession the wedding ring he's gonna propose with to his number one fan this weekend. (and holy hell what a rock) this should be interesting X) as happy as i am for him (AND I AM, JAMES) i still can't help the lingering painful thought in my head that my baby brother is gonna get married. i'll wave the flag of encouragement no matter what, but i still bristle regardless. that's MY bro, cheerleader. handle with care. :F

Otherwise, been working steadily on the commish stuff now that the go ahead was given to do color. It reminds me why i never do commissions tho x.x cause holy hell, i spent ALL OF YESTERDAY (when i wasn't working) just trying to fix ONE of them cause it was giving me such a hard time. geezus that was annoying. and it was the Castiel one too. figures. you'd think i'd never drawn a damn angel before. i was FINALLY able to adjust it enough that it looks good, but man...snjv@alwk!jefaqf. i wouldn't be freaking out about these so much if i didn't know they were going to be printed/sold. gawd. the less i think about that fact the better x.x
so now it's four down, seven to go ^^;
i've been asked once again about travel info and it's driving me bonkers cause i'd love to just get a YES or NO about the UK trip. *__* aarrrggghh. tell meeeeee. *shakes fist* cause my plans for May will be a whole hell of a lot different depending on that answer.
*sigh* this is why i hate planning things.
but i want to go so badly too, if just to go. moreso for the country than the con, but one is just the plus of the other. :3


in other news,
[livejournal.com profile] happytemplar's mama put in the checks we gave her for the grand canyon trip next year, so now i have no other choice X) which is both frightening and awesome cause it's exciting as hell despite the fact that i'm gonna be POOR. omg. i may change my mind on this commission thing afterall x.x
But rafting down the Colorado river for two weeks? so gonna be worth it.

this may seem like a lot going on, but it's cleverly disguised X)
when i get finished with these commission pieces, i swear i am pulling out my dust covered markers and damn well using them. no more excuses.
at this point, i'm generally cranky and busy, but i'm ok. :) and i can work with that.
oatmeal_queen: (fma - head asplode)
So I'm offically doing better. woot.
Spent the entire day without drugs and was able to sit through a full day of getting work done while not being as in pain as i have been recently. it was still there, and i'm still neglecting the hell out of my desktop at home cause the chair kills me, but i'll take what i can get. not taking the painkiller was a big one. go me!
still paranoid about the damn stairs tho.


Talked to mom last night, which was good since the last two days have sucked balls for all of us, yet not good at the same time because my mother's a damn empath and she killed my (fake)mood almost instantaneously cause of all the crap on her end. I'm not completely heartless, i do feel really bad for her, but on the other hand, all of this stuff with her ex/semi-ex/wtf is just pissing me the hell off and i have little to no tolerance for it. i'll listen to her for her sake, and keep my tongue for that reason too, but the continuing saga of douchebaggery is just getting a bit past inexcusable.
which is prolly why it bothers me that she keeps excusing it.
*shakes head*

thus to change the subject for her, i mentioned about how it's a real damn possibility now that i'll be going overseas (eeeeee :D) to which she gave a loud and over protective motherly groan (srsly?) that was then followed by this convo:

E: mom, srsly, it's just England, it's not like i'd be going to Africa or anything (again)
E: mom?
Ma: England?
E: er, yah? I told you about this. many times, remember? possibly going to the UK? commissions? convention?
Ma: well, yah, i remember that...but...you said UK.
E:...yes. United Kingdom?
E: what, you didn't realize that?
E: seriously? London, England, Britain, that United Kingdom? the UK.
E: you totally didn't put that together did you.
Ma: hush.

So this whole time my mother was thinking i was going out to the middle of the desert somewhere in the middle east. for a supernatural convention.
i was adopted.
oatmeal_queen: (spn - walking brothers)
Four years to the day, and I still miss you Dad.
Not much else to say besides that.
i just wonder sometimes what things would be like if you were still here. <3

So today is gonna be fun.
I've graduated from being unable to sit on anything without horrible pain to feeling like i'm sitting on rocks instead. ouch. On the plus side, I can work again, but not all that comfortably x.x This can totally be over now, kthnx.
i would srsly love to be lying down right now.

Still, I'm trying hard to keep in good spirits and otherwise stay occupied for as long as possible. :) These kind of anniversaries shouldn't really mean much compared to the overall. It's not like I miss him any less on days that aren't today, but still. Harder not to think about four years before now on the day itself. i wonder if it'll be the same in ten years.

Still drawing like crazy (woot) and getting Asylum commish work done. I've gotten my first bit of approval so far with the go ahead to continue to inks, so i'm happy for that :3
also got chibis to do for ACEN
and smut to draw for others whenever i get chibied out (which, speaking of, [livejournal.com profile] strangeandcharm did you get my email? i dunno if i sent it to the right address or not -.- i wasn't sure)
i want so much to break out my markers and get my groove back, but i've gotta keep with the time management things to get stuff done. Especially since both Asylum and Acen are in the same month. eep.

Gonna waste time tonight with [livejournal.com profile] happytemplar and [livejournal.com profile] dizziness in the hopes of being in distractinggood company and getting work done.
oatmeal_queen: (hell in handbasket)
Association Meme: Comment to this post and I will give you 5 subjects/things I associate you with. Then post this in your LJ and elaborate on the subjects given.
*words from Sako*

1. Sailor Moon
hahaha, yah, i guess that one's kind of a no brainer. Sailor Moon was my first love when it came to both anime and learning to draw. I traced a lot back then, overtop of really badly printed scans of sailor moon characters straight from the show so that i could color them. then just started drawing them on my own and went from there :3 it'll always be 'that one thing' that i can love and be embarrassed by at the same time. prolly forever.

2. Gay Angel Porn.
i blame molly for this. i srsly duo. it's completely her fault. if it hadn't been a bribe, if i didn't have to do angel porn for her just to get her to kiss me, than none of this would have happened. tease. of course, it's then my fault for continuing, but hey, i got to draw both pretty wings and pretty men making out. ftw. \m/

3. Media Addiction
wellll, ok. yah. the fact that i have about 400 dvd's prolly wouldn't help any sort of argument for that. i love movies. in fact, growing up, i loved them so much i wanted to be IN movies. and i don't mean as in, acting in them, but being behind the scenes. Hell, i'd have been happy holding the damn grip mic so long as i was THERE and a part of it. Never came to pass, but doesn't stop me from being fascinated, and the extras that come on dvd's were made specifically for people like me. i eat em up like candy. LIKE CANDY.
and i love going to the movies. it's just one of those things i will forever associate with good times.

4. Self Esteem
there's a lack thereof. i struggle with it, i deny it, i spit on it. without really knowing why, to be honest, aside from habit and dislike. the fact that it's really that noticeable bothers me sometimes, but it's not like i can back it up all that much. i don't have a lot of confidence in myself or what i do, despite the fact that i still continue to do it regardless. just another one of those things that i wish wasn't an issue :(

5. Natural Dancer
LOL, now that's a matter of opinion X) sure, i LOVE to dance, but not all those who sing can keep a tune. I'd like belly dance so much more if i could stand to watch myself do it, but truly, i just need to get back into practice. i have a love of music and movement that makes me wish i could do it all the time and never tire, which someday, i hope to do just that.
just gotta work on these damn hips first.

oh, and speaking of the Sako, I'm pimping this out for anyone who might be interested:
Her prices for art commishes and services are crazy low, so if anyone can help out, it would be so much appreciated. She's awesome and very wonderful to speak to, so don't be shy. She just happens to be a bit poor atm. help a starving artist in need plz!

in the meantime, i'm not having an awesome evening anymore thanks to a couple of badly timed phonecalls. one of my dear friends lost his mother last night and mom got dumped once AGAIN by asshole of the year.
i keep trying, but my lips may as well be sewn shut for all the good it does.
i'm going to bed.
oatmeal_queen: (spn - dean snore)
i am so utterly exhausted x.x

Went to hagerstown yesterday because my mother asked me to. Got to see family and a few good friends and that was all i needed to really pull my birthday into a nice close. my little bro wasn't there, but i'll see him on Moving Day. my older brother went out and bought my birthday gift ten minutes before he came over. he thinks i don't know, lol. X) oh well, he seemed in decent enough spirits so i was happy to see him. i made him laugh too, which was nice to hear. (just had to weed through all the other horrendously embarrassing things he spurted out and then we're all good)

so i went there and came back same day, followed up with sunday (today) for an absolute, no excuses packing day.

i have bruises EVERYWHERE.

not kidding, i checked. nice big colorful bruises on my arms, legs, torso, NECK (can't figure that one out) some pretty ones on my hands...lordy. and i'm aching, and my back hurts and my knees hurt and i feel so amazingly fantastic because i DID SOMETHING. i've spent the last four or five months being a great big fucking lump and i'm paying for it triumphantly but it feels so great. that gives me hope for pushing myself back into some kind of physical exercise soon because man do i need it. this sitting around and doing nothing crap is draining and stupid. i should have been off my ass ages ago.
man do i hurt tho, haha. i'm gonna sleep well tonight.

half my life was put into boxes today. i have three more days to finish off the rest. the kitchen is gonna be the biggest bitch of all, i think.

We leave for Ohayocon on thursday and come back monday. Moving Day is tuesday x.x i'm INSANE.
still, all in all, today was an excellent day.
i'm gonna miss this, the here and now and the people in it. it's not like they're going al that far away, but i'm gonna miss it anyway. and i'm glad i do.
i think i filled my packing quotient for the day tho. this break i deserve X)
oatmeal_queen: (fma - loud motherfucker)
Birthday was ftw. I had an awesome time in NYC (as we traveled across most of it in 2 degree weather, holy crap) and generally enjoyed myself :3
it was srsly freezing though, i couldn't believe that temperature. my jaw froze. i mean, literally, i was slurring my words because of the wind, and that's, like, one of the first signs of hypothermia isn't it? O__o gawd.
i was, however, happy to continue my wishful tradition of seeing snow on my birthday. and despite how gross jersey is (no offense, all my jersey friends <3) there was a new enough layer of white fluffy snow left for my enjoyment before the air blackened it up.
([livejournal.com profile] sunseenli! i'm sorry i missed you! i tried calling and emailing you, but i think some wires got crossed somewhere :[ )

Another bday bites the dust X) good riddance. I'll celebrate ifwhen I'm sixty.

Otherwise, been trying to kick my ass into gear packing and all around psyching myself up for the move. Am both really looking forward to it, and really not. Not that moving has ever been a problem for me, but you end up with ties to certain things that can be hard to let go of.
My kitty is one of them ;_; gawd, that's gonna be so hard.
E, you SAP.

Went and saw 'My Bloody Valentine 3-D' with [livejournal.com profile] fauxfaia and LOVED every bit of it. it was cheesy and gross and dumb and gross and had PORN IN 3D and was fanfriggentastic. I was laughing most of the way through the movie. which got me some weird looks, but you know what? that movie deserves to be laughed at. campy slasher fic ftw.
that, and i'll gladly take me some more jensen in 3-D. omnomnom.

Mom wants me to come home this weekend cause of the birthday stuff. which basically means i come home and sit there with a last minute cake while she snuggles with her boytoy. funtimes. *mmm, boxcake* i'm pretty resigned at this point to limit it to only a day tho with the excuse of packing. (which really isn't an excuse, dumbass) we'll see how that plays out -.-

Ohayhocon is in two weeks (krist) and i still gotta get my damn shoes fixed and figure out what all i need to yank together at the last minute. we won't have an AA table for this one tho, so thankfully no last minute arts to do. which is good, cause i haven't been able to draw in weeks ;.; still crocheting though. wtf. i need to learn to do something more than scarves...

lord knows my muse and i are not on speaking terms right now.

*curls up in a warm hoody and munches on mac&cheese*


Dec. 31st, 2008 12:27 am
oatmeal_queen: (headpiano)
ugh, man.
this time of year can go to hell. srsly. i've about had it.
i tried, i really did, but no.
screw plans, i can't make anybody happy. not my family, not my friends, not ANYBODY. and i'm too damn sick right now to deal with the guilt.
this is why i hate phones. why being a hermit is so godforsakenly tempting and why i NEVER GO ANYWHERE. cause everytime i do? someone gets pissed. regardless. apparently i can't make decent choices without my mother holding my hand.
thanks universe. thanks bunches.
somebody wake me up when it's the end of january.
oatmeal_queen: (fosters imaginary headdesk)
I just sat in a freezing car for a half an hour, listening to my mother go on and on about the drama that is ALREADY happening before the cultfamily disasterget-together this weekend for Christmas.

The more I hear/think/worry/stress/speak about it, the more I would like to smash my head onto something. repeatedly.

Preferably something sharp.
oatmeal_queen: (st tng - make it so make it so)
Majel Roddenberry, 'First Lady of Star Trek,' dies;
Lwaxana Troi! The voice of the Enterprise! MY CHILDHOOD!

aw, man. so much lame. her final send out will be the voice of the ship in the next star trek film tho, so at least they got that right (so far). had to happen sometime tho, i guess.
how is Shatner still around? man.

I am STILL getting through all of the comments from my last post. good lord. XD i'm so glad everyone liked that picture so much! which reminds me that i still need to finish the rest of the art I've been working on for christmas gifts and the like. >.>

Tricked myself back into doing crochet again and am enjoying every minute of it (aside from the carpal tunnel, but we don't talk about that aloud) otherwise, i'm generally keeping myself distracted to avoid loosing it before the holiday.
and oh, it's coming.
next week.

augh, man. so msn news has lists of the ten most popular boy and girl names of the year, and just for shits and giggles i checked it out.
the top name chosen for girls for this year was 'Isabella'. and i'm like, ok, that's cool, it's a pretty name...
and then it dawned on me as to why that's the top one. and i suddenly feel badly for an entire year's worth of young girls.
ironically (thankfully) there was no Edward in the top list for boys.
but there is a Jacob.
i hate that i know these damn characters XP stupid proxy.

I'm debating on trying to get back into some serious writing now that I've been granted a few random prompts here and there of interesting ideas. Fanfic, yes, but it's better than no writing at all and at least it gets the wheel's churning. of course, i'd like to do something that'll force me to pay attention as well, like limiting to a certain number of words. hard to believe, but that's actually something i have a great deal of difficulty doing.
Conversations with Molly and hearing about Joe's recent adventures with 'Dead Space' have spiked a morbid interest back into Silent Hill. Psychological horror isn't something I've really played with when it comes to writing, but I'll try anything once. If only to see if I can.
Diz also dared me to do a short fic in the SPN universe involving two OC's just to see if i could pull it off without getting too wordy. I may just take her up on that X)

i'm looking forward to seeing my family. this is a good thing. let's see how long it lasts.


Nov. 30th, 2008 09:48 pm
oatmeal_queen: (spn - hope something eats you)
mom returned my call.
looks like all that space in between then and now was filled up with her boyfriend breaking up with her.
totally outta left field. again.
now i feel like an asshole, but that's beside the point.

she can barely talk, she's sobbing, and i ask her if she needs me and she says 'its ok, i'll be alright. i don't need to talk about it. i'm a survivor and i carry on'
and suddenly i hate how easily i use that same damn line.

we can't ever catch a break, can we.

ETA: called lil bro and he talked to her for a bit, got more info. (his woman has done wonders for his feminine side, i swear.)
looks like, once again, mom was dating someone who was pining for the fjords. aka, still stuck on their crazy ex. this one's had five years past the expiration date of his, and he dumps my mother for that? gawd. claims he was dating my mother on a trial basis to see if he could handle it.
oh how sweet. good thing my mother's an unfeeling robot for when you change your mind. jerk.

she drives me nutz on occasion, don't get me wrong, but speaking out of blood relation, my mother is far too sweet and strong to deal with this shit. srsly.

anyone else who feels like being batshit and cruel can just get outta line right now. no really, i'll wait.
oatmeal_queen: (stress option boxes)
Car ended up worse than I thought. about a thousand bucks worse. damnit. daaaaaamniiiiiit.
but it's fixed now, and i have him back so i'm not shooting myself in the foot anymore than i have already by cursing myself. this is what credit cards are for, i guess. it's just another one of those things at this point.

called my mother early this afternoon to tell her about it and she interrupted me to go do something with her boyfriend. (didn't really specify what.) said she'd call me right back.
she still hasn't called.
fine then. didn't wanna tell her anyway.

blah day with blah weather and fighting an all around blah feeling. i'm in between healthy and sick, but i'm working my immune system back up from where it's been by taking vitamins again. i forget why i stopped.

more luck with apartment hunting for christie and i, so it's only a matter of time and picking between our top choices along with who's running deals. so far, i'm optimistic with this. but it's not like i was ever worried about moving. funny, just one of those things i -don't- stress about.
short list.

thanksgiving didn't suck, thankyou to the beautiful Stackwick family.
spent yesterday evening with the BF for some well-needed love.
caught up on my sleep, no recent nightmares.

I'm not the praying sort with any kind of focus, but it'd be really decently awesome for some good stuff to go down in december. it doesn't have to be anything amazing, simply being neglected by bad stuff would be good enough for me.
i'd pray for that. even if i'm the only one listening.

fuck this. i'm gonna have an awesome christmas regardless.
in case anyone needs this that i haven't told already:
My Amazon.com Wish List
do please share if you have one :)
oatmeal_queen: (Boo temper tantrum)
ok...so. my computer is working. GAWD.
after a very long and involved weekend of taking care of my brother after his surgery and getting amazingly miffed at my clueless mother (tl;dr) Dave was nice enough to hook me up with a copy of Adobe CS3. which made me so immeasurably happy in the hopes that perhaps SOMETHING good came from such an undeserved migraine.

but my hopes were soon dashed, only to find that as soon as i installed both photoshop and illustrator, Orion2 FUBARed like crazy to the point that i was expecting flames. i still kinda am.

so i call up superjew, and he asks for my specs. well, embarrassingly, it ends up that this was something i have neglected to keep an eye on for my poor, awesome computer for nearly four years now. since i haven't really upgraded a damn thing in him. oops. not that i really think about these things, but still. SOMETHING should have snapped in my mind to tell me that the more involved a graphics program is, the more awesome my comp would need to be to run it.

Regardless, i am now looking at a total overhaul. technically, i could go without, but it's a timebomb at this point considering all the crap that needs to be wiped clean here. Which means i'll probably be set back a good three hundred if i do it now instead of waiting for the computer rapture. where it would undoubtedly be more.
the amount isn't as bad as it -could- be, considering my relation to superjew, but still. damn. merry fucking christmas.
last year it was my car.

i want my holiday back and i want it back now. *stamps floor*

gawd i'm tired.

on the plus side, i know my brother won't steer me wrong in any way, and that he's barely charging me for the work he'll do. he was also able to hook me up with an uber printer for a decently awesome price to take with me for when i move. not to mention him dealing rather politely with my cranky ass on the phone trying to fix it all.
all good things. *counts them*

i'd vent about the family crap, but it feels like beating a dead horse at this point. i'm glad my mother is happy, (no really, i am) so i'll just let that be it and avoid the topic. if she decides to pull her maturity together and stops trying to get me to make her damn decisions, then this wouldn't be a problem. not that saying anything will make ANY DAMN DIFFERENCE since she's so head over heels in love. whatever. i'm over it.
be my guest and bail on Christmas, i don't care.
it's not like it'll ever be the same again anyway.
*beats that horse again just for the hell of it*

someone let me know when the holidays are over, i'll just be over here making cookies.


oatmeal_queen: (Default)

April 2011

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